Craziness!!!! [Sunday,May 07 2006 @ 11:52pm] [ mood | confused ] [ music | SO SICK! ] This weekend was sooo much fun. Friday school was a bore. Nothing to interesting....although Twinky came to see me at lunch :) Taylor, Sarah and I tried to make it to taco bell but it didn't work out..... After school Kira's car wouldn't start :( I felt really bad, but I hope it's ok now.... I went home and Twinky came over....we watched a movie and then I left for Appleton...Thanks mom for letting Twinky and I say good bye alone ;) Appleton was sooo much fun. Basically I got drunk and went shopping. I was with my sister, her best friend Lindsay, her sister in law and friend Trisha and my sister's mother in law. It was a good time. Friday night we got down there late and we went to Chili's cause it was Cinco De Mayo!! Yeah!! We drank margaritas and tink had cranberry and vodka cause she found out she had a UTI when we got down there. We tried to buy beer after we ate * YOU CAN'T BUY BEER IN WISCONSIN AFTER 9:00!!!! So that was out of the question. We just went back to the hotel and hung out. Saturday we woke up soooo early. Went shopping ALL day, and then went back to the hotel. We got beer and liquor Sat. night so we drank and then went out to dinner at the Olive Garden, SOOO GOOD!!! THen we went back to the hotel drank some more, swam, and then passed out, got up early this morning and drove home. Megs and I went to visit O'neill at work, and then we went to the mall to get Katie a birthday present. After I came home and showered, and then Twinky came over, we watched a movie, and then he went to JT's Shaft to play pool with Jeff and I went to meet Tasha, Matt, and Lorenz at the lower harbour. Then we met Lindsay and Tom, and we all went to the Shaft. After I went home and then went for a ride with O'neill and now i'm home waiting for Twinky. So untill tomorrow.... GOODNIGHT! Let Go

Good Cake! [Friday,April 21 2006 @ 11:50pm] [ mood | good ] [ music | grillz//nelly ] Got to stay home and get paid for cleaning yesterday! Then I had to work :( Twinky and Jeff, and a whole bunch of people came to see me, and it was an okay day. Then I went home and worked on some homework and read for a while..... I fell asleep for like 3 hours and then Twinky came over at 3....I was awake from three till now and I'm still going strong, kinda...a little tired though. Twinky stayed over, he came over with food and lotto tickets....and then we layed in my bed till 7:15 this morning. It was a good time ;) Went to school till lunch, and then I had states. I was like falling asleep though....At lunch I was leaving and Rach came up to me...it was so funny, cause I really don't give a shit what I look like and so I didn't look at myself before I left my house, and Rach was like "What's that, what's on your neck? Who did that?" And then I realized that my neck was like a fuckin cheeta and I have hickey's all over my neck...GOOD CAKE! Then Urbanski came up to me and...we're going to leave it at that. After states I went home and took a shower, and then I went to go get meghan. We went out to the mall for a while and then went out to my dad's new house. Which was pointless cause it was locked. Then we went into town, and went to Hunter Audio cause everyone is getting ready for the comp. tomorrow. CAN"T WAIT!!! Then Jeff and I went to see Twinky at work. Rach called so we came back into town to get her and then I brought her home, and Jeff and I went back out to visit Twinky. We were out there for a while, and then I came into town, and now I'm at Rach's.....It's like the whole dance team and then me....GOOD CAKE!!! Me and Kira are having a GOOD TIME though! I love her!! I'm glad I have someone who understands :) 4 ♥ Let Go

H I B O R N A T I O N Complete? [Wednesday,April 19 2006 @ 11:46pm] [ mood | crazy ] [ music | Kanye West ft. Twista ] Today suprisingly was an okay day. I hung out with Twinky last night, until this morning at 4:30 a.m. A little tired today after only getting 2 hours of sleep, and then having to work right after school, so I didn't have enough time to take a good nap. Last night was brutal, but it got better. Twinky and I talked over everything, and he dropped everything kinda. He told me today he wasn't mad anymore :) So I hope that's a good sign, but he said he was still confused, which still kinda sucks, cause I know that is kinda code for I am really confused, and we probably won't work out. Which makes me really sad, so I was a little upset at work for a while tonight. But Tommy V. was being crazy so it was kinda fun at the same time. Twinky told me some pretty interesting stories last night about being in jail. They were pretty funny stories and it was fun to see him really happy and looking back on that as a fun time?!?!?! Whatever makes him happy, makes me happy. Being with Twinky the last couple days and being extremely happy makes me kinda sad. Cause I know that that's what I want, and it's something I can't have. :/ Sorry that Twinky is the only thing I can talk about in my journal! I am SOOOOO EXCITED for the comp. on Saturday!!!!! I can't wait, and I have Sat. off! I didn't have to worry about taking it off. I just got it off, LUCK OF THE DRAW!! It's going to be so much fun. I hope this weekend is a blast. I talked to Tasha today cause we went to Frosty Treats, and Gary is going out of town Fri. night so I'm kinda hoping that we can all party in peace on Fri. night.....Then Sat. is the comp., and Sun. I leave to go downstate for a couple of days with my Mumma! I'm in a really good mood right now...Today was a good day. Besides the lock down, and the fact that I only got two hours of sleep, and also the fact that I had to work it was a good day. School was kinda boring....But work was fun cause Twinky and Tom were there for hours. Then when I got off I met Twinky, Tom, Jon Roy his girlfriend and his brother, and Cheeser and Ashley at the bowling alley real quick. After I came home and started on my room, MOTHERS ORDERS! Megs I called you but your phone was off and I hate calling your house after 10 I feel kinda scandalous. Now I'm getting ready for bed. *NIGHT* Let Go

Hibornation! [Wednesday,April 19 2006 @ 12:38am] [ mood | crushed ] [ music | My cats ] Last weekend is definetly a weekend I want to erase from my memory forever! I was really excited to have a four day weekend. It started off good, I had a good first night, and second day. Rach and I planned on going to Tommy V's friday night. Everything was good on our way there besides Twinky being crabby, and then it was good when we got there and everything. A lot happend between Me, Twinky, and Gary that I want to forget, and other stuff that night as well. The comp. had to be one of the funnest things ever though. I rode up there with Bill in his mustang. It was a good time, but we were really late so we went about 130 the whole way there just about. I thought I was going to die a couple times. There was a ford focus :) I was so excited! It was B-E-A-UTIFUL!!! I had a lot of fun with Tasha and Kristy not thinking that me and Kristy were going to get a long very well after the night before. Yesterday I made a bad decision. I went down to Green Bay with Gary. The fact that I went down there with Gary wasn't bad, and we didn't fight at all or anything, we actually had a lot of fun. We didn't talk about getting back together, we were just acting like really good friends, so it was a lot of fun. It's when I got back that shit hit the fan. Twinky heard about me going to Green Bay with gary, and not from me. I ruined everything with Twinky because of one day and one stupid mistake and I am kicking myself in the ass for it. Ever since Gary I didn't think that I could have feelings like that again. I thought it was going to be impossible, and that I could never trust anyone again. I was soo wrong. Twinky was one of the best things that has happened to me since Gary. He has been there for me non-stop, and he stuck up for me when no one else would. And I fucked that all up in one day. I will never forget yesterday, not just because of the fact that Gary and I hung out for the first time in a while and didn't fight, but because I lost someone that meant so much to me, that I didn't even consider to think about how much better it would have been just to tell him I was thinking about it, instead of contemplating on going, and then actually taking off without telling the one person that I care about right now more than anything. NOW IS MY TIME FOR HIBORNATION, AND IF YOU CAN'T FIND ME DON'T COME LOOKING FOR ME! I'M FINE I JUST DON'T WANT TO TALK TO OR SEE ANYONE, CAUSE MORE THAN LIKELY I'LL FUCK THAT UP TO! 3 ♥ Let Go

[Thursday,April 13 2006 @ 7:22pm] [ mood | cold ] [ music | A sander ] Last weekend was crazy! That's the gist of it. Friday night after work went to visit twinky at work and then came into town and met rach at the apartment. Twinky came after work and we all hung out for a while. It was all clear and I was having a good time, till Gary came home. I kinda miss him, but I miss who he used to be, he came in all pissed off cause he totaled his car and lost his license, and a whole buncha shit. I tried to talk to him, and we talked for a little bit in his room, and then he was just in a bad mood so he left. Then the cops showed up, it was fricken crazy. So I just went home after being really late, and went to sleep. Saturday night was Bucks' it was B-E-A-UTIFUL until the cops showed up again for the second time. I was stuck in the attack for 2 and a half hours, and then to top it all off I was lying in Buck's bed and a picture from his wall fell on my face, so for the rest of the night I was walking around with an ice pack on my face. Twinky and Matt, rode over on scooters cause Twinky wanted to come see me :) and then they got shut down by Buck's mom (Fuck the Police)!! Enough Said!! This week was pretty boring, not much happend. Today was a BEAUTIFUL reinactment of Mexico! Me and Till and Cath and Jess had a good time dancing to Gasolina! We got such a good breakfast and lunch. After school I came home and slept and now Taylor's over, and me and Twinky are gonna hang out when he's done with his car! :) P.S.- Gary found out about me and Twinky! It was a great convo, let me tell ya! Let Go

WOW! [Saturday,April 08 2006 @ 9:36pm] [ mood | calm ] [ music | Her Parents ] Why did I just have a nervous breakdown in Taco Bell? Who does that? This girl, I guess!?!?!?!?! Let Go

Today! [Thursday,April 06 2006 @ 11:22pm] [ mood | good ] [ music | Justin Timberlake :) YEAH! ] Today kinda sucked, just like everyother day. I've been a straight crab ass for the past like week. For no particular reason I just have been. We sang at the Med Center today which was pretty weak, it wasn't all that exciting, but it did get us out of 5th hour, and we did get to go to Border Grill, so that was cool. Then had to work again. My co-worker cut off the tip of her finger, so I filled in for her. I have to work again tomorrow! I wouldn't be as bad if my job wasn't that boring. Although it is a good time when people come and visit me :) Cora's been my Beanarella love for the past two days! :) After work I went and got O'neill and we went out to Citgo to go get gas, so we could drive around, and so I could visit Twinky :) Urbanski showed up and won $50 on a lotto ticket. Then Sarah and I left to go drive around. Now I feel like shit, cause I'm sick, and I didn't do any of my homework and I have a paper due tomorrow, and I have a lit quiz, so I'm going to try and get out of going to my first three hours tomorrow. Hopefully, I won't get much sleep so that that can be my excuse. Except I already missed a full day this week so I don't know if she'll let me sleep in?!?!?! I really hope this weekend will be fun. I think it will be. We're all just planning on partying, and hanging out all weekend, and just having a shit ton of fun. I hope that it actually turns out like that. I really want to hang out with Twinky at some point so hopefully sometime this weekend we can do something. Who knows? I'm prolly going to go over to Jamie's with Amy on Sat. for a little bit, before we go celebrate Buck's birthday somewhere. We gotta get on that. Rach I'm glad Bentley's better! Better-than-sex cake this weekend? 2 ♥ Let Go

Repeat! [Wednesday,April 05 2006 @ 11:02pm] [ mood | stressed ] [ music | Sex and the City ] I might start writing in my journal again. I might start coming back online again. I might even be over the whole myspace thing, who knows. All I know is the last couple days have been hell. I've been nothing but crabby and pissed, and I just want this week to be over. It doesn't help that I have to work the next two close shifts but whatever. Why can't guys be normal? Why can't they treat girls with respect? And why can't they just have one? What's the deal with guys needed to have more than one girl, whether it's more than one girlfriend, or a girlfriend and a whole bunch of side girls just to hang out with when your not around? I don't get it. Why is it that I can't be happy when it comes to guys? I feel like everything was perfect Freshman, and Sophmore year, when relationships weren't that serious. Everything was perfect with me and Doug, and I fucked that one up. Then I moved on to someone who I thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with, Gary. Well that didn't happen and I got fucked over myself. Not only did he cheat on me on my last day of my Junior year going into the biggest year of my life, but he also cheated on me again when I was at my cousin's house having a girl's night. I thought I moved on with Jerad, but that didn't work out, and now there's Twinky. I like Twinky so much! I would like me to be the only one who he kisses, and sleeps over, and hang out with, and all that jazz, but I'm not. I'm not used to dating a guy who has a lot of friends that are girls. He always tells me that none of them mean anything and I know that they don't but I'm just such a jealous person I can't get over the fact that he doesn't want to hang out with just me!?! Yesterday was Gary's birthday. It was the first time I talked to him since our big fall out the day before I left to go to Mexico, which was the GREATEST THING IN MY LIFE! *By the way!* He followed me and O'neill everywhere last night and it was kinda creepy. Hanging out with Urbanski does really help though, even though sometimes he makes you feel like shit, it's all good! Cause you know he doesn't mean it. There's so much going on right now, I just want to run away and scream! 2 ♥ Let Go

Been a while! [Tuesday,April 04 2006 @ 8:15pm] [ mood | weird ] [ music | Nothin ] This weekend was so fun. Twirp was a blast with Buck. I've never had that much fun with my friends at a dance. It was the first dance I went to without a boyfriend. I'm at O'neill's right now. We're on our way to Urbanski's to take a hot tub. Earlier we got a hot and ready and then met up with Canchola and Tara! It's Gary's Birthday today, so I called him and it's the first time I've talked to him in three weeks. Then me and sarah saw him, and he like followed me, and we raced :/ Kinda weird but whatever. I have kinda a lot of homework but who does homework when we have like a month left of school? Off to Hot Tub! :) Let Go

Tonight! [Friday,March 03 2006 @ 7:12pm] [ mood | excited ] [ music | Best Friends :) ] Tonight is going to be a good night! Can't wait! Went to school late, then took like a million tests, and quizes. Went tanning after school, and then went home. I took a shower and got ready, which took me forever and it never does, and then Twinky came over for a little bit. Tasha called freakin out, so I calmed her down or tried to, and now I'm at O'neill's getting ready for a GOOD TIME! We're going to Target, and then to get something to eat, then going to the game for a little bit, and then coming back here. We're going to take a hot tub, and watch a movie before everyone comes over. Then the fun will def. begin!!! Let Go

Christmas [Saturday,December 24 2005 @ 2:40am] [ mood | drunk ] [ music | DDR ] Well tonight was pretty fun. I took my cousins to the apartment, and we had a fucking blast! I finally got Grape Smirnoff, me and Kim bought two six packs of different Smirnoff's. It was so fun, there was so many people. Plus I finally played DDR. SUPRISE! Tomorrow I have so much shit to do, I'm getting up, and going to see my cousin that is flying up from Kentucky, and then I'm spending most of my day with Gary. We're going to do gifts, and then we're going to my aunt's house, and then we're going to his parent's house, and then his aunts house. Then I'm going to Midnight Mass with Lauren and her dad. Tomorrow is CHRISTMAS!!!!!!! I'm so excited. There is so much to do in the next couple of days. I've been doing nothing but shopping, and working during break. But I'm having so much fun with my cousins, we're doing so many things. I don't think I've never been so busy! I'm so excited for the next two days! But I'm going to go to bed I think, Night! Let Go

Frustrated [Sunday,November 13 2005 @ 3:29pm] [ mood | busy ] [ music | Remax Realtors ] I feel like I have a million things to do.... I'm trying to type my paper for english, and I don't want to....I have so much homework, and I want to take a shower. I still feel really sick from my medication, and I want it to go away! This weekend was pretty fun. I threw Rachel a suprise party, and it went good. There were a lot of people, and she really had no idea about it, which made the suprise thing go pretty good. Decorating was probably the most fun!!! There was a little drama, but when isn't there? Last night Gary and I rented The Longest Yard, and Unleashed. They were both really good. We spent like all day watching tv, and hanging out, which was good cause I wasn't feeling good at all.We layed in his bed for like an hour last night listening to music, and talking about what the songs reminded us of, or what came into our heads when we heard it...It was kinda cool. But I suppose I should get back to my paper. I gotta go get Megs soon so we can go get our paychecks. Sarah I hope you find Barney! I know how it goes, but he'll come back! He's to spoiled to stay away:) 1 ♥ Let Go

Lake Tahoe [Thursday,October 20 2005 @ 5:10pm] [ mood | grateful ] [ music | Home Improvement ] Yesterday I went to Lake Tahoe. It was soo pretty. The baby slept the WHOLE way, and didn't wake up till we got to Red's, a restaurant in Carson City. It was pretty fun, besides the high altitudes, and the curvy roads, it was gogeous. I talked to Lauren and Meghan, and Jerad today. It's good to talk to people from home. But to hear someone is as sad and unhappy as he is, makes me sad also. I'm not going to let it ruin my trip though I wonder how he's doing. Tonight we're carving pumpkins, and finally eating corn on the cob. I just got up from laying on the couch for almost 3 hours, with the baby laying on my chest the whole time. Part of my wants to stay here forever with my nephew. It's so amazing having something so small laying on you and being so fragile. You wonder what their thinking? Hunter didn't wake up the whole time. He just layed there. It was the cuttest thing ever, and I want to keep him, but I know I can't. I can't wait for my sister to come home, so I can spend all the time in the world with him. I really want to be a fun aunt. I want him to love me, and want to spend time with me. I want him when he grows older to look up to me, and call me for advice. I would love if that's how the follow up would be. And I really hope that's how it goes. I miss you all, and tomorrow I will be spending the whole day traveling home, to a cold place in the Upper Penninsula. :( Let Go

Today! [Tuesday,October 18 2005 @ 3:29pm] [ mood | content ] [ music | T.V. ] So I still haven't started my homework. I read a little but didn't get to far, cause I was too distracted with the baby. Hunter has a little bit of Jandis, or however you spell that, so we have been putting him next to the window a lot, and we brought him oustide for a little bit today. I talked to Tasha today, and she's doing good. I talked to Gary for a little while. We're doing ok, and I feel a little better now. I was really angry cause I thought he already moved on, but he got a hold of me, so I guess we're ok right now. It's making my vacation a little better not worrying anymore about that. I picked up some pictures of the baby today, and they are so adorable, but I hate EVERY picture of me. He went in for another test again today, and we'll find out in the next couple of hours the results. Tomorrow I think we're going up to Lake Tahoe, and I'm kinda excite to go look around. I've already been there before, but I'll be there with my sister and Bry and they know a lot of things around there, whereas last time my dad and I had not one clue. I think I might go outside and read a little, it's so nice out here! Then maybe I'll tackle my Pre-Calc. Or maybe not? Love you guys, and miss you all! 2 ♥ Let Go

Update [Monday,October 17 2005 @ 11:30am] [ mood | cranky ] [ music | T.V. ] Last night we all watched the Interpreteur. It was pretty good, but you really had to pay attention. Nothing to much happened within the last couple of days. Hunter just left to go get some tests done at the hospital. I still haven't started my homework, and I should probably get going on that. I think we're going to Lake Tahoe in the next day or so. Jess wants to go to Old Navy, and Bry just wants to go. So we're all going to go, and take the baby on a road trip. Plus my mom has never been there before. So, that's pretty much it. Nothing else to big going on here. See you all on Sat. 2 ♥ Let Go

Great [Sunday,October 16 2005 @ 5:14pm] [ mood | crappy ] I love how everytime I leave I find out shit I didn't want to know. Back to your old ways huh? That's cool. I'm back to worrying. Hanging out with the same people you once used to? Well that's good for you, I'm glad your happy! NOT! This is the time I worry the time that comes down to who your true friends are!?!?!? I love drama and I love leaving. It's cool that I have to sit here on my vacation looking at the time and wondering what your doing. I HATE IT! And I hate wasting my precious time with my new nephew wondering who your with, and what your doing, and how everything is going in your life. I'M FUCKING SICK OF IT! WHEN WILL THIS PAIN EVER GO AWAY? WHEN WILL I STOP WONDERING WHAT YOUR DOING AND WHO YOUR WITH? WHO ARE YOUR TRUE FRIENDS WHEN IT COMES DOWN TO IT? God why does everything have to be so hard when it comes to who you LOVE? 6 ♥ Let Go

Day 1 [Saturday,October 15 2005 @ 6:33pm] [ mood | confused ] [ music | Hunter Daniel :) ] So, today my nephew got circumsized :( He was soo upset all day. And still is. He got to come home today though. When he got home I got to hold him, and we both watched tv, and slept for like 5 hours on the couch, while my sister took a long nap, in her own bed :) My mom is cooking dinner tonight, and then we're all going to watch the Interpretuer. It's a little weird hearing a baby cry. A little weird looking outside and seeing mountains on each side of you. It's beautiful here, and I'm thinking I don't want to come home. Everytime I look at the clock I add 3 hours to find Marquette time, and think about what Gary's doing. I thought I was over it, but seeing my sister and how happy her and Bryan are with their new baby boy, and my nephew, I just get so depressed to the thought, that Gary and I were once that happy. I would love to just stay here forever with my nephew, and my sister. It's gorgeous out here. It's warm, and I don't want to leave Hunter. But everyone has to come home at some point hey? I'm going to enjoy the time I have with my new nephew, and eat something, cause I haven't eaten in forever! 3 ♥ Let Go

YAY! [Friday,October 14 2005 @ 11:29pm] [ mood | happy ] [ music | Nothing Yet ] So, today was the longest day every. -woke up and went to the school -drove to Green Bay -Flew to Dallas, TX -had a two hour lay over -flew to Reno, NV -Then drove to Fallon, NV My brand new Nephew is 7 pounds and 11 ounces. He has light colored hair. His ears and nose are the cuttest things I have ever seen in my life. His name his Hunter Daniel Sandstrom. He is 20.5 inches long. He was born at 2:40p.m. And he comes home tomorrow. My sister did up his room so cute. I'm in it right now. Everything is just so great, "knock on wood" and I am so happy for my sister. He is the cuttest baby on this earth, and I LOVE BEING AN AUNT!!!! Tomorrow I'm going to the hospital to pick him up, and then my mom and I are getting the house ready for my sister to come home to. I miss you all! I'll be home on Sat. Megs I'll give you a call like I told you I would prolly tomorrow or Sun. And the same for you Tina, and Sarah. Tasha I'm sorry I didn't tell you I was leaving but we'll do something when I get back. ACT's on Sat. Oct. 22 who's ready?!?!?! 4 ♥ Let Go

:) [Wednesday,September 21 2005 @ 10:43pm] [ mood | tired ] [ music | The News ] Just got off the phone with Tasha. Matt is being rediculous. I'M REALLY SICK OF HEARING SIRENS! IT MAKES MY LIFE A LIVING HELL. EVERYTIME I HEAR ONE I THINK OF THE CAR ACCIDENT, OR THE OTHER NIGHT WHEN I SAW A MAN COVERED IN BLOOD BECAUSE HE GOT STABBED. I'M SICK OF SIRENS I'M SICK OF FIRE TRUCKS, AND AMBULANCES, AND POLICE CARS PATROLING ALTERNATIVE ROUTES. Tomorrow is the visitation, and the funeral. Alli is coming up, and I'm excited for that. But I'm not excited cause it's not really for a good reason. Friday I'm so excited for. It's homecoming, and our outfits are fucking AWESOME. Tomorrow night is the sleep over at Catherine's. Late night, early morning. We're going to kick ass in the Yell Fest though. I gotta get this damn A.P. English paper done, that I can't figure out. It's so hard. Why did I take that class? I'm going to bed. I'm stressed! I have a headache. Can the pain ever go away!?!?!?! 1 ♥ Let Go

Mmmm Good! [Wednesday,September 21 2005 @ 10:17pm] [ mood | loved ] [ music | T.V. ] Weird, and I don't know why I'm filling it out, but the cousin sent it, so What Ever! Sex Survey : Are you a virgin? No How many times have you had sex? Are you supposed to keep track? How many partners have you had? One How many partners have your partner had? "?" It's probably bad that I don't know that hey? Do you use condoms? Of course What kind of condoms? Trojans of course Do you listen to music? Yes If so what kind of music? HIM Do you have oral sex? Not anymore Have you had an orgasm? yes If so what is the most in one sitting? 16 Are you proud of your man or ashamed? Proud Do you brag to your friends? Depends on who I'm talking to. Tasha and I, always brag :) Do you feel weird talking about it? Kinda Do you feel weird filling out this survey? Yeah a little, but whatever. Are you going to have your friends fill out this survey? If they want. K, that's enough of that. Kinda wierd but I love my relationship, so why not share? ;) 1 ♥ Let Go

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